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I just realized that I never did update about my gramma's heart test. Well. It's not good.
She has a large aneurysm in her aorta. It isn't causing her pain, andwhenif it ruptures, she'll die hopefully instantly.
This is basically the same thing that Grandma Johnston had while she was undergoing her dialysis 6 years ago, so you know, I'm kind of going through this whole thing of alternately denying that anything's wrong and wanting to spend as much time as possible with her.
The thing is, when Grandma was sick I was so caught up with school that I never got out to see her. And then when she died I went through a pretty severe depression because of the guilt of not being there for my father's mother. And now with Gramma it's this whole... she's the matriarch, you know? I mean, it's not ritualized like in other societies, but since my grampa died so long ago, she really has been this cohesive point to the whole family.
***
The above was written about 3 hours ago. It's amazing how much your mood can change with the application of good friends, good conversation and good food. Mmm.
I'm going to a wedding tomorrow. They emphasized how casual it was, so. I'm not really sure what to wear, but whatever. I'll be seeing my uncle so I'm happy.
She has a large aneurysm in her aorta. It isn't causing her pain, and
This is basically the same thing that Grandma Johnston had while she was undergoing her dialysis 6 years ago, so you know, I'm kind of going through this whole thing of alternately denying that anything's wrong and wanting to spend as much time as possible with her.
The thing is, when Grandma was sick I was so caught up with school that I never got out to see her. And then when she died I went through a pretty severe depression because of the guilt of not being there for my father's mother. And now with Gramma it's this whole... she's the matriarch, you know? I mean, it's not ritualized like in other societies, but since my grampa died so long ago, she really has been this cohesive point to the whole family.
***
The above was written about 3 hours ago. It's amazing how much your mood can change with the application of good friends, good conversation and good food. Mmm.
I'm going to a wedding tomorrow. They emphasized how casual it was, so. I'm not really sure what to wear, but whatever. I'll be seeing my uncle so I'm happy.
